November 9th, 2008

teen true love

(no subject)

If I don't get enough sleep, I hurt worse and more easily. Which means this whole week that has been entirely too short on sleep.. I've been in a lot of pain, and a little emotional. Last night I started bawling listening to a cover of Tom Smith's "A Boy and His Frog".
Mike's been wonderful. Offering to go out for dinner for me, rubbing my back, and just in general being a complete sweetheart. Since I knew I was going to sleep early, I made dinner early last night. Super duper easy cheater chicken and dumplings.
I pushed too hard yesterday. Had to go to Costco, and Dad decided he would meet us there. We did our shopping there, then went to the grocery store. On our way home, we remembered the Legion's bazaar and stopped there. I got some smoked salmon for W, and an aloe cutting. Happiness! I should have gotten a lot more smoked salmon, it was nice, not too salty, and nicely dried.
So after we got home, and got that super easy chicken and dumplings started, we popped in Sundown: The Vampire in Retreat, which is one of my favorite movies. Mike hadn't seen it. Not even Bruce Campbell made up the badness for him. The wooden bullets.. Maxwell Caulfield's looming campiness, all of it.. he asked me if I felt dirty. Nope. And I pointed out he hadn't yet seen any of the Killer Tomato movies, so he shouldn't push me to prove how bad it can it be. But admittedly.. it's pretty bad if you expect movies to have things like plots and good acting just because you recognize the names starring in it.
Whine whine whine. Ah well.. today is a lot better.
  • Current Music
    Joe Giacoio- Superman's Midlife Crisis
good idea-bad idea

(no subject)

I have this unhealthy tendency sometimes to look at the blog of one my husband's ex-girlfriends. She's so very not me. Politically, socially, spiritually, she's the evil anti-Shala. Well.. maybe not evil. But definitely a lot more mainstream then I am. She's obvious and practices serial monogamy. She's very conservative in an in your face sort of way. It's like chewing your fingernails though. A disgusting habit you tell yourself you're going to break, even while you do it again. Of course, I stopped chewing my fingernails when I was 7. This one is a bit harder to break.

But then I started thinking of ex-boyfriends who still think of me sometimes, and wondering if their girlfriends/wives have found my journal. The disadvantage to having a fairly uncommon name is that it doesn't take mad google skills to find me. My first name, and my hometown in google find me easily. Do they read my blog and think "She's so boring, all she ever talks about is crafts and her family. What did ___ ever see in her???"

And what would I say to someone like that? You know, if they did find me, and actually stay with my crafty rambling long enough to still be checking occasionally? I just don't know. Yes. I actually am this boring, and fairly happy with it. I hope you can drop this habit, because it's not a good one. I'd suggest starting a support group, but maybe a support group to stop checking up someone with that person in the group is defeating the purpose.
I think, this week, I'm going to try my level best not to check her blog. Stopping myself when I'm tempted. It's a horrible habit, and she really doesn't deserve this much of my time and thoughts, or the comparisons. Our value systems are so different that comparisons are silly anyway. Take it like it was a 12 step program. I admitted I was powerless over my unhealthy curiosity and that my life has become unmanageable. And for one day at a time, NOT check her blog.
Comments are screened, anonymous comments are allowed, so if you want to say "I do that too!" you can to only me. Or for that matter, if you're the girlfriend or wife, you can tell me to go to heck and how much happier he is now, and rub my face in it.
  • Current Mood
    thoughtful thoughtful